Knowledge is Power....

I had a mom-piphany yesterday.

So I was helping Simon get dressed and he very matter-of-factly said, "If you hold your middle finger up by itself it's sign language for a REALLY bad word. But if you hold all the other fingers up, it hides it and you are just waving and that's okay."

Hm.

Awesome.

I asked him where he learned it and he said his classmate, we'll call her Zoe for purposes of this story, told everyone. ( Zoe has shared ALL kind of wonderful things this year so far. NOT my favorite classmate, I have to say. )

So, Zoe apparently gave the entire the class the middle finger and explained how it's "sign language".

"Soooo... what did your teacher do?" I asked.

"She told Zoe to NEVER ever EVER do that again."

Well, I guess that's good. But now I have a five-year-old who knows all about the middle finger. Fantabulous.  Third grade is one thing... I think Ben has heard it ALL by now. But kindergarten? Seriously? WTH.

Now, I will say, honest, open, and intelligent explanation for things has really always been my parenting strategy. Guess I just wasn't planning on having to use it much with a five-year-old...

But, as I'm learning QUICKLY, I really can't keep him in the dark about these things and it's dumb for me to try. Ben, I could, for awhile because he was my first... but with two of them in school now and the influence of all kinds of other kids, and some really interesting characters in his class this year... well, I'd be stupid to think I could keep Simon in the dark.

And Simon, especially, needs good and thorough explanations of why or why NOT to do things. Ben seems to have an innate sense of what's okay to try and what's not and a good, healthy fear of getting in trouble. Simon? Notsomuch. His judgement is occasionally lacking.

So, lest he decide to flip someone the bird at school this week, I decided we'd have a chat.

"Okay, Simon...." I began. "You know how we try not to say certain words around here? Words like 'stupid' or 'fart'?"

"Yeah."

"Okay, well, those aren't bad words, really... those are just silly words that we just don't like all that much. If you say them, by accident, you probably won't be in trouble. There are just better, smarter words to use.  But words like what the middle finger is sign language for? Those really ARE bad words and if you ever say them or use sign language for them, especially in school, you're going to end up in the office in BIG trouble. Okay?"

"Got it."

Sheesh...  middle finger. At five. Who knew?

Dear Zoe's parents... WTH?!