End of the Road...

I think I just pumped for the last time. I only got an ounce this morning, so yeah, I'm pretty sure it's time to end it now. ;)

It's very weird and freeing, I must say!

What will I do with all my free time?!

Still Going...

So, the pumping... well, I haven't stopped yet. I'm at two pumps a day. I could easily be at one, since I only get between 4-7 ounces a day TOTAL right now, but honestly? The quiet time between 7 and 7:30 (sometimes 7-8 depending on how distracted I get and how long of a day with the boys it has been) is too hard to give up. LOL!!!

I'm not joking.. it's SUCH a respite to just go hide out in the bedroom in the comfy chair with my laptop and the tv remote. Bonus, Jonathan gets a fresh bottle right at bedtime. (and a small one before his morning nap)

I'm not sure how long I can hang out at this amount... but, I might just attempt keep it up through flu season just so he gets SOME kind of protection from all the various things his two older brothers will bring home from two. separate. schools. (sigh) Part of me thinks it would be nice to be completely free... but on the other hand, the 20 minutes in the morning and the 30-45 at night don't really bother me and, like I said, I find the me-time relaxing and rejuvenating.

So we'll see... I'm anxious to post an "I'm FREE!" post... but I think the quiet time and potential immunity boost for Jonathan is winning right now.

I Can Taste Freedom....

I have been down to two pumping sessions a day for the last three days. To say it has been fantastic would be an understatement. I have gotten so much done in the afternoons without that 30-minute afternoon session hanging over my head.

Now... how to get from two to one and then finally free altogether? I have two weeks to figure this out. I'm thinking it's just going to work itself out because I seem to be getting a little less every morning... down to about 14-16 ounces total now for the day and only 4-6 ounces of that is in the morning. Hrm...

One Month to Go!

The great pumping "experiment" continues. I really and truly can't believe I have made it this far and even if I have to limp to the finish line, dragging the silly breastpump behind me, so help me, I will make to one year.

And I'm almost there! I do 3-4 pumps a day still, depending on Jonathan's napping and what we have going on. Getting pretty much 24 ounces right on the nose every day. Most days, this is enough to cover what he drinks, but every other day or so, I run out before it's time to pump again, so I thaw out a bag from the freezer.

So basically, my freezer is still RIDICULOUSLY full. I am going to be thawing out bags for a LONG time after his first birthday, I think. Months, maybe? Depends how the whole milk transition thing goes.

At any rate, almost there! Ready to be FREE and the countdown is on! :)

And it Finally Happened....

...had to tap into the freezer stash of milk. Jonathan is apparently going through some kind of growth spurt. Couple that with the fact that my supply has gone down slightly since the drop to three pumps a day and yeah, barely keeping up with him over here! I've only had to use one bag so far and defrosted another overnight in case he woke up again, but now the supply has officially been tapped. ;) That's why it's there, I know... but it's kind of weird! Also, I'm now wondering what to do when we leave for vacation next week. Do I take a handful of frozen bags? Will it be enough? Should I tote the can of formula I've been hanging onto too? Gah. Wish this had started happening just a week or two later! LOL!

Graff Dairy... HUGE MIlestone.

As of last night, finally, finally finally finally finally, and did I mention FINALLY, got rid of the pumping session in the middle of the night. Still had to get up with Jonathan once last night for about ten minutes... but otherwise? Slept reallllllllly well. Oh glorious, happy day!!!

Three times a day now! WOOHOO!

Graff Dairy... Month 10...

LOL. Not sure how, but I blinked and nine months have gone by. Also not sure how, but I have continued with the pumping all this time! I'm pretty pleased with myself, I have to confess! Nine months and no formula! (except the couple ounces they gave him in the hospital the night I treated myself to my last good sleep for awhile) At this point, based on what I have in the freezer, he'll definitely have breastmilk for a full year one way or another, which is awesome. I wouldn't have wanted to make the switch this late in the game anyway... would rather just transition him onto whole milk in the next couple months.

I still pump four times a day. My goal over the course of this month is to get rid of the pump I still do in the middle of the night. My supply has dropped enough and I've been going enough hours during the day that I think very soon I should be able to go the 9-10 hours or so overnight without too much trouble. During the day now, my max between pumping sessions is 8 hours. It will be pretty freeing to get rid of that one though, I have to say!

After that, I don't know what will happen.. but like I said, my frozen stuff is standing by waitied to be used. So what will be will be. So proud to have gotten this far!!! :)

The Experiment Continues...

So, the pumping... still going. I just dropped down to four pumps a day though because a) I wasn't getting as much during my late morning/late afternoon pumps as I had been and it seemed like a good time to just combine them and b) It was getting harder and harder to fit in a late morning one. So that's the one I dropped. Now I pump when I get up, somewhere around 1 or 2p.m., before bed (usually 7:30 or 8) and then whenever I wake up in the night... usually around 12:30.

My supply has definitely been impacted with this change. I'm down to 40 or so ounces a day, which is still a surplus, so it's all good. I'll admit though that it's a little unnverving to see it plummet so quickly though.

The next pump to go will hopefully be that midnight one. I'm thinking in a month. After that, I kind of expect things will tank pretty quickly, but I'll keep going as long as I have any kind of supply. Haven't taken a freezer inventory, but I probably have enough for a couple months or so as long as all of it survives the move. Maybe we'll get to a year, maybe we won't... but it will come close and I'm good with that!

Anyway, so we'll see how it plays out... I'm kind of just ready to be done though. Lucky thing it's not something you can just quit overnight. :)

Graff Dairy Update...

The great breastpumping experiment of 2010-11 continues. Nearly eight months and going strong. Despite still being at five pumps a day, my supply has dropped some. I had a HUGE drop when I had the kidney stone and again when I had the stomach bug and while my supply did come back (thankfully) it never bounced back entirely. I kinda needed to lose a few ounces though, so no biggie. I'm down from 60 or so a day to more like 45-50. I have stopped freezing milk because a) I don't have time in my morning routine right now since I have to straighten the house every morning before school and b) I don't want to have to MOVE any more milk than what is already in the freezer, which is a ridiculous amount as it is.

Also, interestingly, one side produces only half the milk the other side does now, for reasons which are unbeknownst to me?

Jonathan only eats somewhere around 22 ounces now, if that (!), so I still have a surplus, all of which I am dumping down the drain now. At first that bothered me... now I find it pretty liberating. LOL.

I'll be honest, though the pumping is cemented into my routine at this point, it's getting old. Really old. Especially getting up at midnight when the baby isn't awake. But at this point, I've come so far, I would regret quitting, I just know it. So I'll plug along as long as I can. I'd like to make to a year, because I'd be proud of myself... plus it seems silly to put J on formula this late in the game. I'm not even sure he'd take it now and I REALLY don't want to spend the money on it. I have one can that I bought before he was born as a backup before I knew how this pumping thing would work out and I guess I'll break it out if I have to... but hoping to get to a year with that sucker still unopened. It's motivation every time I open the kitchen cabinet where it lives.

So that's that. I'm pretty proud that I've gotten THIS far... we'll see how much longer the great experiment continues. ;)

In All The Excitement...

With all the chaos of the trip and being away from home and whatnot, I neglected to post about Jonathan turning five months old. (took the pic though)

...AND that I hit my latest pumping goal, which was to last through this trip ...

I will do the monthday post when we get home sweet home tomorrow and as for the pumping -- onward to six months, says I! Heck, if I could last through pumping this last week in Disney park bathrooms, airport bathrooms and rental cars, I can surely hit the next goal which doesn't involve any of the above! ;) Oh how nice it will be to pump in the peace and quiet of my living room when we get home!!

Graff Dairy Update...

So, the pumping.

Still going.

It's kind of just part of my daily routine now and mostly doesn't bother me... except when I have to be somewhere during a time when I'd usually pump and I have to juggle everything around to work it out. And getting up at 11 or midnight... notsomuch a fan of that. But anyway...

Fun new discovery. My milk apparently has too much lipase. which is the enzyme that breaks down the fats. (this really only comes into play with stored milk, doesn't affect the fresh from the tap stuff) Anyway, I kind of suspected this because I have thawed out a couple of test bags from the freezer for a sniff test over the last few months and they smelled weird... sort of metallic. Then two days ago, I smelled a bottle that had been in the fridge for 24 hours (only 24 hours, mind you!) and it smelled like vomit.

Yeah. Awesome.

Jonathan has only had fresh stuff so far. The oldest milk he ever gets is from the pumping session prior to the most recent one, but generally, his bottles are MAX, a few hours old.

As for the stored milk -- I've read that the stinky stuff is okay to give them because it's not actually bad... the lipase has just started digesting the fat in the milk and makes it smell like various things -- namely metal and/or vomit. I hear it tastes like those things too, though it gags me to think about trying it and gags me to think about my baby drinking it.

So... I dunno where to go from here. I'm not sure if I'll ever give him the stuff in the freezer? I guess I'll just pump as long as I can stand it and figure it out from there.

It's always something!

Graff Dairy...

So the great pumping experiment of 2010-11 continues. I am basically to my next goal, which was to make it until my sister-in-law Krystyna had her baby. Granted, said baby has not arrived yet, as he seems to have some phobia of the outside world... but I had assumed he would be here by now and so we're going to call that goal basically met! ;)

It's all pretty routine now, though I still groan when I have to drag myself out of bed at 11:30 or midnight for the last session of the day. I'll be happy when I finally let that one go in a month or two.

I pump five times a day now, about every five hours or so, for about 20 minutes at a time.... still getting the same ridiculous amount of milk every day. Jonathan, however, has been having himself a little growth spurt the last week or so and so I'm freezing about 6-10 ounces less a day than I had been. This is not a bad thing, because my freezer is now literally overflowing as in, when I open it, I have to stand back, lest I be pelted with bags of frozen milk. That will be remedied soon enough though. I found a mom nearby who is going to take all of September, October and November off my hands. WOOHOO! Not only will this clean out my freezer, but it will provide an extra incentive to keep going for another three months to rebuild the stash with new milk.

Next stop, end of January. (Disney trip) Then? Probably Feb, which take me to six months. Honestly, I can see myself doing this at least through spring... though I could definitely see me getting annoyed with it when the weather warms up and the days get longer. Ideally, I'd like to continue him on the fresh stuff until his first birthday though... so we'll see. One goal at a time. Currently, I'm in the house all the time anyway and it's freezing outside and dark at 4:30 so who the heck cares if I'm stuck in the house hooked up to a pump? Not to mention, I'm in major hibernation mode and eating nonstop, so the pumping is also helpful in that regard. LOL!

Anyway, so that's the semi-regular update on the Graff Dairy. Still going strong! ;)

Motivation...

If I ever get down about this whole pumping thing, I just need to go visit my gyn. I received all kinds of gushing from her today about how amazing it is that I can do it all day every day and how she hated it and couldn't keep it up while she was working and rah rah rah wow wow wow! LOL! (please note that personally, I do not find it all that amazing because it's really all I know, but people who have nursed and pumped only on occasion seem to)

The pediatrician is almost as motivational. He seems to find my output and dedication to it fascinating. Though, I have to say it's a little weird to keep having conversations with the pediatrician about my boobs.

So if I just visit each of them maybe twice a month for the next nine months or so, maybe that will be enough praise and motivation to get me to a full year. ;) What I'm saving in formula costs, I'll spend in co-pays, but it'll be worth it! ;)

Pump it Up...

So yeah, still pumping. Going on ten weeks now, which is kinda amazing to me considering that at two weeks, it seemed like doing this for any length of time might really be impossible. But, things have gotten SO MUCH easier... I've dropped one of my overnight pumps, the one between 2:30 - 3:30a.m., which has helped immensely, so I'm only pumping six times a day now,sometimes five. Also things seem to have leveled off enough that I can go five hours during the day if I'm busy and I need to. (I try not to go more than four hours though)

I've been pondering how to start rotating the massive quantity of frozen milk I have since I'm about one shelf away from running out of freezer space. I actually have started giving it to Simon as chocolate milk sometimes. He doesn't seem to notice... except for today when I pulled some out from early September (the few times I'd given it to him before now, I gave him fresh that I had left in the fridge from the same day). It apparently tasted weird because he noticed. It smelled soapy to me too, which I'm told happens to frozen milk sometimes. It's fine to drink, it just makes the taste a little off. Here's hoping Jonathan will take it (going to experiment with that today sometimes) because otherwise, I'm just going to have to start tossing it, which just might make me cry. But what can I do? If I'm out of freezer space, I'm out of freezer space!

Still determined to make it through January and maybe longer...

One pump at a time, one day at a time!

Thoughts on The Great Pumping Experiment of 2010-2011...

So I'm about six weeks into this whole pumping thing and here are some thoughts I've been meaning to put down.

It's not as bad as I anticipated it might be. Not all that inconvenient, not painful... on the other hand, the 3-4 hours between pumps flies by, which sometimes kinda stinks.

It really DID get way easier after the first week or two with the engorgement stuff and whatnot, just as all my bf'ing mom friends told me it would... things are all regulated now and I'm rarely uncomfortable unless I sleep too long at night. (which, truthfully, is not a bad tradeoff for some extra sleep these days)

Tom has finally kind of accepted it and stopped being grossed out by the whole process. However, he still HATES when a bottle leaks "that stuff" on him.

I pump seven times a day right now, which isn't bad... but I think once I can get it down to four (not for quite awhile) it will be much more manageable and will make sticking it out more months way easier. I am tempted to start dropping pumps, like at least one of my two middle of the night ones, but am trying to hold out until 12 weeks when it might have less of an impact on my supply.

Speaking of supply. Yeeeah, no issues there, at least at this point. I am finding the idea of actually ever having this issue a little hard to fathom. My basement freezer is half full of frozen milk already. At least count, over 600 ounces, or 21 days worth or so if I had to feed Jonathan only from that stash. As it is, I keep up with his daily feedings with just the fresh stuff without a problem, which I feel great about.

*Very* much annoyed by the breastfeeding boobs. I look forward to them eventually being my normal size again. It's my biggest complaint about this whole arranagement. I feel like I could probably do it forever otherwise.... well, if it weren't for the big boobs and the middle of the night pumps.

While I am not the type of person to think it's the end of the world if my baby gets formula (I have two children who thrived just fine on it), at this point, I definitely would feel bad about giving Jonathan formula anytime soon. First off, (since there is nothing else to do while pumping usually), I have read just about everything there is to read on the internet about breastmilk vs. formula and yeah, even this die-hard formula feeder has to admit there is no comparison. The La Leche League should be proud, a total convert on a THIRD child? That has to be virtually unheard of. ;) Also, on a more superficial note... formula smells AWFUL. I never really noticed this much until I started handling breastmilk and realized that it has NO weird, iron-enriched stinky smell. The baby's spit-ups don't really smell either... which brings me to...

The poop. I do appreciate the less offensive odor of the breastmilk poos, I am NOT loving how they have a tendency to explode up and out the back of the diapers. We have at least one of these a day over here. I have moved J up a diaper size and it still happens, so I guess it just comes with the territory. Ugh!

Now that I have mastered both hands-free AND operating on the battery pack, I am mobile! This has made a HUGE difference I can hook up and then if the baby starts fussing in his crib or I need to get something for one of the boys, I just pick up the pump, throw it over my shoulder and go wherever I need to. Just need to remember not to answer the door this way. LOL.

The cost. Yes, it's free and eventually, I will break even with the cost of the pump vs. the cost of formula. But I have to say, if you are looking for a great deal vs. the cost of formula, this pumping thing is not the way to go. I am buying Lasinoh freezer bags every couple weeks and that adds up... I've also had to replace one pump part already which was $12 and a few more Medela bottles, which are not cheap either. If you are going for free, opt for the straight from the boob method.

Weight loss/metabolism. Truthfully, I have lost the pregnancy weight at the same rate I lost it with the other two boys. (I know this because I blogged when I hit my pre-pregnancy weight with them both times) Currently, I'm hanging out at about four pounds above that magic number. The biggest difference I DID notice that I can credit the pumping with was how quickly the belly deflated (not that that didn't come with a price... ridiculously horrendous afterpains that lasted a little over a week!!) and also how much I can eat without holding onto/gaining any weight. I could get used to the fantastic metabolism and it's definitely motivation to do this as long as possible!

Believe it or not, there are aspects that make it more convenient than formula feeding -- the ability to leave bottles out at room temperature for hours on end, for instance. Makes the middle of the night feedings SOOoooo much easier than measuring and mixing formula or warming up a bottle of pre-mixed formula. It's also nice to be able to just carry the bottles around in the diaper bag with milk in them as opposed to worrying about how long they've been out of the fridge or worrying about carrying pre-measured formula and water. If I have my pump with me when we go out for long periods of time, I don't have to worry about if I've packed enough bottles/formula for the baby... I also like that J can work on the same bottle for hours until it's gone. You can't do that woth formula! An hour and one feeding and then you have toss it!

I'm loving the guilt-free internet time. 15-20 mintues every few hours to just sit back and surf? Awesome. Especially when Tom is home and I don't have to worry about the baby waking up or being entertained.

I've revised my goals for pumping to make them a easier to reach and therefore, more motivating. My next one is to make it three months. They refer to this as "bronze boobs" on all these message boards I keep reading on the topic. So yeah, I'm hoping to go bronze. After that, my next goal is to make it until my nephew is born in December, because at that point, I'll have company because my SIL will be pumping too, which I know will be motivating. It's always nice to have company. After THAT, it's to make it through the DIsney trip at the end of January (five months) and after that, it's six months (silver boobs!)... LOL! That's all I have mapped out for now, but so far, so good.

And with that, the baby is fussing to get up from his nap... I have more thoughts, I'm sure... but I'll have to come back and edit later. :)

Sleep Eludes Us...

The sleeping at our house the last two days has just been atrocious.

We had another night of Jonathan refusing to sleep in any way other than on his belly and I Have to say, I'm just about ready to throw all caution to the wind, send up a few prayers and just give him his way.

Poor Tom didn't even come up to bed at all last night until midnight, the end of his shift. He spent until then sleeping on the couch with Jonathan sprawled across his chest.

When I took over at midnight, I took him up to his room, (where I had set up the air mattress earlier in anticipation of this type of evening) fed him, changed him and the two of us passed out on the air mattress together around 1:15 and slept until 3. After that, got up to pump and he joined me shortly thereafter to eat again and he was awake when I pawned him off on Tom at 4:15. I don't know what happened after that because I passed out cold in bed until 6:30 when Tom came in to deposit the baby in the Pack and Play, get dressed and and say goodbye before he left for work.

I KNOW this will get better. I do know that.

What's particularly frustrating though is that there has been no even minuscule amount of improvement to help me see the eventual light at the end of the tunnel.

It's starting to kill my whole rah - rah pumping mentality because I know at least a small part of the problem is that the breast milk is digested so efficiently that I really can't hope for more than two or three-hour stretches for awhile. I almost feel like I'm shooting myself in the foot... not to mention, wasting precious sleep hours pumping.

Luckily, that's not something I can just quit overnight... there's a whole process and frankly, I'm in too much of a mode of complete intertia right now (not to mention I have so little desire to bring any more discomfort upon myself voluntarily) that I probably won't do anything to start that process. So hopefully, I'll get through this dark, oh so sleepless patch we're going through right now and emerge on the other side with a better outlook on continuing pumping... the biggest thing motivating me to continue right now is the idea of having to face the pediatrician and tell him I quit. Gah. Just the thought of the disappointed look on his face makes me want to go hook up to Bessie (the pump) right now. NOt to mention, I remember how much I regretting quitting last time around and I know I'll feel that way again... so just trying to press on.

So yeah... dunno what to do about the sleepless child. Tom and I need sleep or we are very cranky people. We are not the type who function well on four hours here and there.

So... belly sleeping... do I just make the crib as safe as possible and just do it? I have half a mind to call the pediatrician and ask his thoughts on it just in the hopes he would actually say something like, "Look, he's full-term, healthy and has no breathing issues... if that's what will get you all decent sleep than just do it." You think he'd say that? Yeah... me neither. :(

Btw, kind of on topic, Tom and I ran across this book at Barnes and Noble this weekend... HILARIOUS. Maybe it's just because we're so sleep deprived, but we both laughed our heads off.

Three-Week Doctor's Appointment....

My not-so-little guy is... ready for this? NINE POUNDS, SEVEN OUNCES. He's gained an entire pound and two ounces since he was born. Gah. Way to grow, little dude! Oh, and up an inch from his birth length. He's 21 inches long now. No idea on percentiles because this doctor does not volunteer them... I'll have to look them up later, though I'm almost afraid to!
ETA: Well, my only options are to say he's "Zero" months, which puts him in the 94th percentile for weight... or if I say he's one month, which he's closer to, he's in the 9th percentile. So maybe he's not so huge after all?

The doctor says he's perfect and thriving and all is wonderful. :)

He also got a heel stick, which he most certainly did NOT enjoy, but otherwise, was pretty calm for the whole visit. :o)

We go back on the 7th for a six-week checkup and some shots. I forgot how often a newborn has you back and forth to the doctor's office! Sheesh! Plus, we have to go back as a family in a few weeks to get everyone flu shots. THAT will be a fun visit.

At What Point is Enough Enough?!

So my dedicated freezer in the basement? One entire shelf is overflowing with bags of milk. This is wonderful and great and yay for lots of surplus breastmilk ... rah-rah supply and whatnot. But um, yeah, I'm failing to see how I'll EVER use it all. As it is, Jonathan is only getting the fresh stuff right now and I'm stashing away something like 30 ounces a day.

I'd hate to give him frozen when I could be giving him fresh, so I'm torn as to when to start using it. (obviously, when I quit the pumping thing and have no other option, we'll start going through it... but now?)

My inspiration/exclusively pumping hero, my sister-in-law, says she started rotating the frozen stash at three months and giving my niece half fresh/half frozen that point. But even still, I'm wondering how I will ever use it all, or continue to have room to store it all. Do any of the local hospitals take donations? Anyone know?